1. |
April 5th, 2012
06:27
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First love
Do you remember those twilight morns?
Where the stone met the earth?
Where my words met with yours?
'Cause I do
Lord knows I do
Oh the ways that we grew
Underneath that twilight sky
We were just kids
Forced to grow up too soon
We were just kids
But I knew that I loved you
We were just kids
Did that silver ring grow heavy on your hand?
From our dejecting curses?
From the grieving waters pouring from our voids?
If I could go back
Would I have been enough to bury all our lamentations?
Would you have stayed?
Could you say?
(Frozen tongues laced our bones)
(You built your tomb inside my home)
(Pink ice left me in the cold)
(Our lonely bones have grown so old)
Nostalgia
Have you missed those boundless glacial Winter nights
Wistfulness
When our language breathed into the entropy?
Do you miss the way our fragile
Shapes fit skin to skin?
'Cause I was scared of what you'd think
But I still let you in
And now..
You can't hear me now
My xanthous rays
Were eclipsed by your sweetest shadows
And now they've left me in the dark
I tried to love you the best I could
But I heard the passion die in your words
Oh twilight love I tried so hard
But I let you down
Were we meant to live this any other way?
Meant to mend our heartaches?
Meant to nest into the magic of our times?
If I could go back
Would you be the same as all your ways inside my memory?
Would you
(You snapped my heart in twain)
Have stayed?
(Lost my voice in the pain)
If I had changed?
(Frozen arms held your bones)
(I built my tomb inside your home)
(Green eyes hung me in the cold)
(From balcony poles and poems untold)
Reminisce
How my life broke down in your chilling reticence
Pensiveness
When you collapsed into the entropy
I still miss the way our hands perfectly intertwined
A part of me will always be in those days of our lives
But now..
You can't hear me now
Haunted by your words
That I was "too fucked up to be loved"
At the cusp of my darkest days
I felt myself sinking into the black
I begged and I begged and I begged
I begged you love to pull me up
But you let me down, you let me down
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2. |
BOO: TD
04:36
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Mystic melodies in time
Elevate my conscious mind
In your cosmic elegance I knew
What it was to feel alive
With your harmonic wisdom I'll
Never go back (never go back)
Stitch myself into the design
Of this kaleidoscopic life
Realize
All this time
No matter the sting from the blade of the age
I had what it took to survive
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3. |
Painter of Tenerife
04:04
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To a vibrant, kind young soul
Who paint my heart in streaks of gold, I know I
Could only brush with hues of gloom
Around your amber bellflower in budding bloom
Do you know how bright you shine?
Have you seen the trail of light you leave behind?
'Cause your luminance still warms my worn outline
I know that some days you're not always your best
I know that sometimes you find yourself in the nothingness
But know this my gentle soul
You're worth all the world
And all of the love you hold
It's invaluable
And the beautiful way you are
Will always make you whole in the end
You will always be my friend
I know that some days it's hard to find your place
I know that sometimes you get lost in all the empty space
But know this my gentle soul
You're worth all the world
And all of the love you hold
It's invaluable
And Emma I swear I know
When your father looks down on you
He couldn't be more proud
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4. |
Moped Stories
03:58
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5. |
October 27th, 2012
15:15
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I saw the leaves of Fall in the midst of it all
Caper with the sighing breeze and endless cedar seas, it bleeds
With evergreens, with verdant galaxies seamlessly weaved
'Tween midnight strands, abyssal onyx streams
Burnished blossom browns they bury me
In a deep ravine of soothing oxytocin fleece
Shifting weight, I can't escape, embrace the melting cold
The blaze within burned the reaper's somber hold
Oh midnight star
How your eyes bring my heart to my throat
Shadowed umbra, phantom anima
Below
Nostalgic ecstasy for olive skin
I crave the way your hands felt placed below my chin
Sweet sixteen and seventeen I know that
We were only kids, but your lips felt
Like the comely Hiraeth home, a love I'd somehow always known
And it's so strange, the way your ways
Ensnared the vibe of the age, like lantern
Flames cry out to a confined space
In the endless depths of a haunted place, I could
Taste the peaceful rest that I had sought for for so long, the Keter
Sphere, the Ain Soph Aur, the night owl's mystic heartbreak song
But I may never know what it was about they way that you were
That stole its way to untouched fathoms and caused the waters to stir
Or why the nightfall tress and chestnut depths were the psychic archetype
To a magnum opus that I'd search for in the moonless dead of night
You had me stargazing
Constellating
Unfurling waves
In fervent shades
But was it anything to you? Did the moments move you too?
Or was the symphony all in my head?
Did the aches begin to fade? And the nightmares drift away?
Could you see the light up ahead?
I fell in love with the searing cold
I fell so hard for those days of old
I fell into waterfalls of blue
I fell apart waiting here for you
Here for you
Stargazing
Was it worth saving?
Unfolding days
In sober shades
But was I good enough for you? 'Cause with a single look I knew
I would never be the same
I gave my all and more for you, even though I was afraid
But I can't help but feel I'm to blame
I fell in love with the loveless cold
I fell so hard for those words untold
I fell into regrets and distant views
I choked and gasped waiting here for you
It was you
Always you
Though those Autumn eves have wilt with the trees
Blossoms of brown will always take me back
You are the light before the rain
You are the life inside my veins; the galaxies inside my brain
You are the start, you are the end, you're all the love I had to give
And oh I wish, I wish, I wish I'd told you
How much I loved you then
Midnight tress and chestnut depths
Were the best that happened to me
Heartbreak burnished blossom browns
So dark that I couldn't see
"Too fucked up to be loved" I could
See the look in your eyes
Every moment felt like home with you
But I was left here to die
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6. |
TAA: CG
05:54
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The Autumn breeze blew withered leaves
Around my shrinking slender frame
These were the years, these were the years
That I would never be the same
Melodic hums and double time drums
Blared heartache through my ears
Synesthetic euphonies
Alleviated all my fears
Bleeding lines and suicide
Muted nights and silent tears
Oh brother don't you get it now?
You're the reason I'm still here
So when the night bears down on me
I won't be chasing ghosts, 'cause I've set them free
There's no ghost left to haunt me
Your heartfelt words have burned their way
Into every fabric of my being
Your kindness and humanity
Spark a fire in the lines I'm screaming
The bittersweet, Winter forest beats
The soundtrack to my sentimental years
Oh how they've persevered
Bondi songs and flowerbombs
Will always be a part of me
'Cause despite all the torment
The bitterness and grief
The beatings and reasons not to stay
Despite the bloodstained blades
The ropes I've hanged
And tears that fell for years
I am still here
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7. |
A Grey-Eyed Missy
02:41
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To a saffron star from worlds beyond
Whose name I never knew
November nights, and December days
Was I too much for you?
Sweet undertow, where did you go?
You were my Sun, that shined in the snow
Why was it so hard to say that you loved me
Without poison in your blood, or smoke between your teeth?
Monochromatic
Words lost their meaning in your cinereous wells
Monochromatic
Did I mean a thing to you because I couldn't tell
Frozen sunshine
Frozen sunshine
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8. |
Blue-Haired Flower
04:24
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Blue-haired friend
Oh how things have changed
I wish you all the world
I miss you more with every day
Blue-haired friend
I know you longed for death
But I hope that you know
I'm so glad that you stayed
Words won't ever be able to convey
What it meant for you to be there for me
I'm so glad you stayed
Should you ever find yourself
Slipping low again
Please don't let yourself forget
Of all the good you've done, my wonderful friend
Words won't ever be able to portray
How proud I am that you're still here today
Blue-haired friend
I'm so glad you stayed
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9. |
December 10th, 2012
07:29
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December air kissed the crypt that I called home
Beloved absentee, how your deep hypnotic gaze leaves me
Within your cedar webs and nostalgic evergreens
I had hoped that you might becalm the noise
The way you did on that cold Autumnal night
It was such a gentle squeeze
The haunting way that your voice adorned the breeze
But those burnished blossom browns bury me
In an era of innocent, sweet mystery
In a love that speaks in 12-string galaxies
Because of you, I saw the best in me,
But now I can't pretend
'Cause the rope was the only one that
Held me in the end
With the songs I left unsung
The threaded hand of death coaxed the air out from my lungs
Its bruising hold a doleful soothing cold
Embellished webs of red
Didn't believe the words you said
The canticle of silence dimmed the light
Inside my grieving head
Would it all been different had I spoken to a friend?
Would it have ever changed a thing?
Would it save me from the bitter, lonely dead?
I tried to live this life the best I could
In the stilling winds you can always find me
In your satyr dreams and all the in-betweens
I couldn't bear to see you go
But burnished blossoms left me buried down below
With the words I left unsaid
She found me hanging there, green eyes around my neck
With hurtful lies I heard from shadowed skies
Did it hurt you so?
To see your baby sinking into the undertow?
Did you finally get it?
I was in so much pain
I just couldn't stay
October air kissed my lips, it felt like home
But first love, you made me feel like I was all alone
'Cause I was alone
I had always been alone
And I knew, like this I wouldn't survive
And if I wanted to live, this part of me would have to die
With my teenage years, with those days of our lives
And it ripped my heart to fucking shreds
To watch all I loved fade to echoes in my head
I was just a kid scared of losing all my friends
But in those burnished blossom browns I saw everything
Oh how it haunts me so
I will never forget that year in the afterglow
"Too fucked up to be loved"
Would you have stayed?
Had I changed?
First love
Can't hear me now
As the rope takes me home
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Surrounded In Solitude Winter Springs, Florida
Surrounded In Solitude was created by Stephen Bridges of Winter Springs, FL in August 2012.
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